Seeking Clarity


In one week, I will be officially unemployed. To put it another way, I will be a full-time entrepreneur. If I’m fully honest I have just as many questions (about how my bills will get paid) as I do possibilities. I’m at the crossroad of excitement and fear, but I’m not alone. Many of us are in transitional seasons right now. We find ourselves in situations that lead us into the unknown based on an internal pull. This means it’s time to stretch and grow.

I’m a firm believer that your professional growth is directly correlated to your personal development. Therefore, focusing on you is the surest way to maneuver any situation or new level. Knowing that I won’t be teaching traditionally anymore, I have a lot to evaluate. Instead of acting like I have it all together, I’m looking inward for answers, upward for guidance, and side to side for resources.

Looking inward: Leaving teaching is a transition I considered four years ago. I knew there was another lane for me, but I lacked guidance and was offered a higher paying position at a new school. Two years into the new position, I felt a nudge to leave the classroom (again), so I started teaching part-time. In hindsight, I made many decisions over the past four years out of comfort, fear of insecurity, or lack of knowledge. I can’t afford to do that now.

With a week of teaching left, I am forced to think deeply about where I want to go, why, and how I will get there. I don’t think we take enough time to consider why we make decisions and if they will lead us to our ultimate goal. Ultimately, I want to be a writer (specifically an author and tv producer), but I haven’t always been clear of my path. In my lack of clarity, I’ve gotten comfortable in transitional spaces, wasted energy, and amplified fears.

Revisiting my end goal means tackling the tasks I avoided before, assessing and using my skillset and moving forward. I’ve known what I could do, but I’ve been scared to do it. Four years later, it’s clear that there will never be a perfect time. It's time to take the first step and prepare to leap.

Upward for guidance: I came across a sermon yesterday titled, “When the Battle Chooses You” by Steven Furtick. I would argue that when we have internal pulls, it’s because we’ve been chosen for something greater. In essence, I didn’t choose this entrepreneurial life; it chose me. That said, this battle of figuring everything out, isn’t all mine. If God put me here, He plans to see me through it.

Essentially this was the spirit behind Furtick’s message. He advised us to fix our focus. If what I’m doing is God-led, I need to be looking to Him for everything I need. If my concern is provision, I need to give that to Him because when I take it on as a burden, I exhaust energy I could be spending on doing my part.

Recently, I’ve been in a fog trying to figure out the best next step. However, this morning I stopped looking at the big picture and decided to focus on one task to see through all the way. The best way to get everything done is to do what you can one at a time. Anything beyond that is your battle to face, but not yours to fight.

Side to side for resources: Along my journey thus far, I can pinpoint specific people and conversations that led to opportunities. If I didn’t share my need, seek guidance, or take advice, I wouldn’t be where I am today. For the last week, friends have given me books, advice from experience, and suggestions on what to do next as I figure everything out. We should never underestimate the power of connecting with those around us. People who have been where you are going can give you something to hold on to along the way. Listen and act.

A week from now, life will be different. Instead of mulling over all the things I don’t have in place, I’m going to get clear on what I want, give it to God, and take action on what I can. We don’t have to have all the answers. Sometimes being willing to move and open to instruction is enough to put us in the right direction.

#transition #entrepreneurship #personalgrowth #clarity #personaldeveloplment

© 2016 by Jasmine Hawkins